- Getting a driver’s license and a car.
- Attaining independent housing.
- Getting and maintaining a job.
- Prioritizing education.
- Caring for a pet.
“Getting my license was really important for me. This isn’t the same for everyone because some people don’t get the opportunity to do that. I was grateful for that—getting a car so I can be more independent. I was able to drive myself to school, to extracurricular activities, which was ballet, and spending more time with friends. I was living in a further town and was able to be more involved in my town, being so far away.” – STAY youth
- Proactively reaching out to youth.
- Checking in on youth consistently.
- Spending quality time together with youth.
- Having fun, not just having time spent together be based on achieving goals or seeking resources.
“I trust adults to support me when they’re emotionally mature. They’ve shown through their actions that they can be trusted. They just want what is best for me, and that is very apparent in how they act. They’re overall just sincere and don’t sugarcoat things, being up front with me if I need to change or work on something.” – STAY youth
“The transition from one case manager to the next is difficult. [Youth] feel like they’re having to retell their story. I, as their case manager, am the centralized person throughout their entire journey, which is very beneficial. As they continue on, it’s me that they refer back to. I have heard that from youth before: ‘you’re just going to leave me too, so what’s the point in establishing a relationship with you?’” – STAY case manager
- Checking in on youth’s mental health.
- Modeling emotional regulation during challenging moments.
- Responding to youth’s needs and emotions in a non-judgmental way.
- Modeling healthy choices and behaviors as an adult.
“Adults being emotionally regulated really helps. I struggle with a handful of different mental illnesses that can sometimes put off my own emotional regulation. So, them being people who understand the position I’m going through and how to redirect it without amplifying my feelings or how I’m expressing them.” – STAY youth
By supporting youth’s emotional wellness and choices, youth can build confidence, resilience, and a more hopeful outlook on adulthood.
- Feel respected by adults in their lives.
- Build trusting relationships with adults who guide them.
- Gain confidence in their ability to have adult responsibilities.
- Have learning opportunities that come from potential mistakes.
“One of the things I say to my youth is that I will walk alongside you. I will work as hard as you do. But I will not work harder than you, and I will not do things for you. If you need me to sit next to you while you’re filling out that application, sure thing. If you need me to walk into Human Services with you… absolutely. But I’m not going to fill out the application for you. I’m not going to do the meeting without you. You can take action, and I will be there with you.” – STAY case manager
“We spend a lot of time talking about permanent connections and healthy relationships. Our youth can be vulnerable and easily taken advantage of, whether it’s by their foster or bio parents. When foster parents no longer receive the financial benefit, sometimes they just totally drop off from supporting these youth. I have youth who really struggle with feelings of abandonment. We try to help with engaging in positive permanent relationships and establishing healthy boundaries with foster or bio parents.” – STAY case manager
“This is why I also feel like going into being a teacher. I know I’m not going to make the best money, but it is something I’m going to love. It doesn’t matter if I’m not going to make as much money as everyone else, because I know it’s going to make me happy. And I know that I’m going to help a lot of people and kids. When I think of thriving, I think that I am doing well and am happy.” – STAY youth
- Building financial literacy
- Developing communication skills
- Learning time management
- Building emotional intelligence
- Learning how to maintain a household
- Seeking resources independently
Case managers said it can be hard for youth to focus on abstract skills when they are going through something traumatic. STAY case managers prioritize skill-building that will create habits for when youth are entirely independent. They also focus on breaking unhealthy habits that youth may have been forced to learn to survive.
“The biggest thing that we are teaching is how to advocate for the life you want. Youth have oftentimes had to use unhealthy practices to survive… We’re working on how to switch from that survival mode to a thriving mode of communication.” – STAY case manager
“Thriving in adulthood means having the opportunity to explore and indulge. It’s having a sense of knowing yourself and when you have the opportunity to do more than just survive. Thriving in adulthood means maintaining what you have and opening opportunities for more.”
– STAY youth
“The biggest challenge I have is my mental health. Because of things that happened in my previous household, I developed many mental health illnesses, and that’s been very difficult for me and the people in my life. It can put a strain on my relationships.” – STAY youth
STAY case managers raise the fact that there are long waitlists for certain mental health services. There is also a lack of culturally appropriate mental health services, such as Native therapists. Youth rely on their case managers to:
- Find mental health resources.
- Model coping strategies.
- Be a safe person to discuss mental health with.
“We do a lot of social emotional learning and asking how we can work together when sometimes there’s disagreement. We teach a lot about healthy relationships and building confidence skills at ILS.” – STAY case manager
“I may not have all the money to do the things I want to do, which would be very nice, but having money to enjoy myself and other people, not just to get by. Having a stable job I enjoy doing.” – STAY youth
- Extended foster care
- Mental health resources
- Housing supports
- Employment resources
- Financial education resources
- Basic needs resources such as food pantries
STAY case managers sometimes struggle when youth are resistant to seeking services. Case managers must navigate the tension between finding appropriate resources for youth and how the youth may feel about using those resources.
“The tough one for me is getting youth to understand those services are supportive even if they aren’t exactly what the youth is looking for. There’s some resistance to some of the supports offered vs. what they think they need… I’ve got a youth who had contact info for a shelter, but she doesn’t want to go into a shelter. She just wants her own apartment, but that’s not possible right now.” – STAY case manager
- Accessing transportation
- Affordable, sustainable housing
- Mental health resources
- Post-secondary education resources
STAY youth may need extra support in navigating these resources during their transition to adulthood and independence. Many STAY youth are low-income and may not be able to afford certain things, such as a car. Many STAY youth may also have a smaller support network who know of a smaller pool of resources.
“Access to transportation is huge. Some youth aren’t interested in getting their license because they can’t get a car anyway. We don’t have Uber or Lyft in our area. If you’re looking for a ride after work, good luck. I see that even in bigger communities—it’s inaccessible or too expensive.” – STAY case manager
“I have been to ILS classes, and I also taught a living skills class and was able to learn more about it through teaching it. Since everyone needs the skills one way or another, everyone is learning. Then you can learn from the people in the classes, which I think is really helpful.” – STAY youth
“One of the things that I have been screaming about for years is that I need another staff. There is not enough of me to go around. I do 4 programs. I feel really spread thin. If we could have an extra staff for 10 hours a week, 5 hours a week, I would love that. I did have someone 5 hours a week for a while in the past who did my busy work, and I was able to really focus on youth. We served 21 youth this quarter, so there’s 21 on me in 4 different programs. I think sometimes kids get forgotten about because I’m dealing with so many other things.” – STAY case manager
“I really struggle with that because we don’t have any type of mentoring program in our area, no Big Brothers Big Sisters. We have nothing. So I just try to rely on getting them out and meeting people in the community and doing community events so then they can connect on their own with other supportive adults or at their jobs we encourage them to make friends. But we’re strapped as it is with our funding, where we could do a mentor program because we just don’t have it. So I struggle with that area a lot.” – STAY case manager
More informal ways of building relationships naturally, such as through playing sports or other hobbies, often cost money and are inaccessible to STAY youth. Relationship-building can also be hard for STAY youth who may be struggling to meet their basic needs.